Snakes on an Island
I like bad movies; in fact I purposefully go out of my way to watch bad movies because often they are so bad that they become entertaining. Sadly made for TV creature horror "Vipers" isn't one of them because whilst it's bad it never once becomes entertaining. Here we have a movie about mutant snakes which have over taken an island eating what they kill but whilst we have dodgy special effects when it comes to the snakes it never once turns the cheese into comedy.
After mutated snakes escape from a research facility they end up on Eden Cove in the Pacific Northwest and before long they have over run the island leaving a collection of inhabitants to battle against them. But some nefarious business men at the company behind the research facility don't want to kill the snakes but capture some because of their huge financial value which makes a rescue mission is not what it seems.
Even when you take into account the fact we have a storyline about venom from Vipers being used for cancer treatment "Vipers" ends up one of the most unoriginal movies I have ever watched. Following an episode which sees the snakes escape and establishes the corruptness of certain business men we get introduced to a collection of people on Eden Cove from former marine Cal to pot growing gardener Nicky and within 10 minutes or so we have are collection of people who we will follow and what the danger is. Talking of which we see the snakes kill a horny couple in a tent, the tamest of scenes you will ever see.
As such what follows is purely ordinary as "Vipers" has are group of people battling to survive, a romance forming between Cal and Nicky, the nefarious businessmen and a fake rescue mission and of course the islanders own plan to kill all the snakes. It is like a really dull procession of cliche scenes where people die, people run, some scream, some fight and not a lot really happens to make it exciting.
Now before I watched "Vipers" I knew it was going to be a bad movie and I was looking forward to a poor movie which crossed the line and ended up being entertaining for being so bad. But not once does it get anywhere close to being entertaining even when we have some of the fakest looking snakes and cheesiest of characters. Maybe because it takes itself all too seriously and doesn't deliver any tongue in cheek humour that it never crosses the line but strangely it is more disappointing for not being entertainingly bad than just for being bad.
Aside from that well there are a few recognizable faces in "Vipers", Tara Reid, Corbin Bernsen, Jessica Steen, Aaron Pearl and Don S. Davis are just some of the recognizable actors who appear. But beyond the fact that you may know their faces you won't care much for their characters or what happens to them but rest assured those who do wrong die and those who are nice live.
What this all boils down to is that "Vipers" is disappointing but ironically it is disappointing not for being a bad movie but for not being so bad that it was entertaining for the wrong reasons.