Snow Beast (2011) John Schneider, Jason London, Danielle Chuchran, Paul D. Hunt, Kari Hawker Movie Review

Snow Beast (2011)   2/52/52/52/52/5

John Schneider in Snow Beast (2011)

It's a Beastly Shag Pile

Up in the Canadian wilderness it is common knowledge that people disappear without a trace but it doesn't stop people going there to enjoy the skiing and snowboarding. It also doesn't stop Jim (John Schneider - The Rebound) and his wildlife research team heading there each year to research and monitor the Lynx population. But this year something is different and it's not just that Jim's daughter, Emmy (Danielle Chuchran - The Wild Stallion), is going with him having been expelled from school but the Lynx are also missing. Perplexed by the animal's disappearance they start investigating and soon realise that something non human is stalking them. At the same time local ranger, Barry (Jason London - A Golden Christmas), is also investigating what is going on but his focus are on the tourists which have vanished.

Ever since I was a child and watched "Dukes of Hazzard" I have been a fan of John Schneider, he may not be the greatest actor or the biggest star but he has easy going charm and that certainly helps when he appears in a lame movie. Talking of lame movies that brings me to "Snow Beast" which opens with a scene featuring a snowboarder being killed by a monster in a deep shag pile rug, yes to you and me we are talking a Yeti or Abominable Snowman but here is called a Snow Beast. And that means we have a mundane creature feature/ horror movie where people are stuck in the wild battling to survive against this shaggy monster, I mean the really terrifying and completely believable snow beast.

Danielle Chuchran in Snow Beast (2011)

Now creature features can be three things; good when they have horror and atmosphere, lame when then achieve none of that and then the magical so bad they are good. Sadly "Snow Beast" is just of the lame variety as it doesn't get so bad that it becomes entertaining for being so. And it is lame because not only does it serve up a lot of cliche but also characters who say daft things and do even dafter things which in normal life, when you are being terrorized by a monster in shag pile, you just wouldn't do.

In the end the movie's saving grace, well saving may be a bit too optimistic, is the likeability of the cast. The actors may play some seriously dumb and cliche characters but the likeability of John Schneider, Danielle Chuchran and Jason London make it bearable. As for the Snow Beast itself it is nice not to have a movie which relies on special effects and CGI even if this monster in shag pile is the least convincing thing I have seen in a long-time.

What this all boils down to is that "Snow Beast" is simply a lame creature feature which fails to be the horror movie it wants to be. But if you are a fan of either John Schneider or Jason London it is just about bearable.