Movie Details

Earthstorm (2006)


Baldwin Goes Where No Man has Gone Before

If I was up on the moon last night doing my work it wouldn't be there anymore - John Redding

Stephen Baldwin and Amy Price-Francis in Earthstorm (2006)

Think "Armageddon", think TV movie, think even more over the top than anything you will have ever seen and what you get is "Earthstorm" a movie which is simply terrible. Everything about, the characters, the dialogue, the special effects the outrageous drama as a demolition expert helps the ASI save the world by repairing the moon it is simply bad. But, and there is a but, because "Earthstorm" is one of those movies which becomes so bad that it becomes entertaining because you can't stop laughing. When the space shuttle flies through a meteor storm with the manoeuvrability of a fighter plane you crack up, when ever Stephen Baldwin's character speaks you end up laughing and so it goes on to the point that as a disaster movie "Earthstorm" is a disaster but one hell of an unintentionally funny one.

When a massive asteroid hits the Moon it has a knock on effect for the Earth as not only do clouds of fragments start breaking through the atmosphere but it cause the Moon to crack. With data showing that a huge chunk of the Moon could split off and head to Earth causing a new Ice Age the ASI recruit demolitions expert John Redding (Stephen Baldwin - Jesse Stone: Night Passage) to use his knowledge of precision explosions to see if they can prevent the Moon from splitting in two.

Anna Silk in Earthstorm (2006)

To put it simply "Earthstorm" is an "Armageddon" rip-off, we may have the slight difference that following an asteroid hitting the moon it is cracking up and endangering the Earth what follows is in the same manner. Where we had Bruce Willis as drilling expert in "Armageddon" we have Stephen Baldwin as a demolitions expert who is recruited to help save the world by going to the moon and using his knowledge of explosions to try and stop it from splitting in two. Yes it really is that daft and that similar to "Armageddon" and whilst we get subplots from demolition man John Redding having been a workaholic since his wife death to scientist Dr. Lana Gale having issues with Government advisor Victor Stevens it is simple stuff.

Now being simple isn't a criticism, some of the best movies ever made were simple and being a TV movie isn't a criticism because there are good TV movies. Unfortunately TV movies rarely make for good disaster movies because they don't have the budget to deliver the special effects and action and that is certainly one of the issues with "Earthstorm". There are some nice effects which whilst fake, such as meteors crashing down to earth, still look quite good. But then unfortunately you get effects which look like they have come out of a computer game especially when it comes to the space shuttle encountering a meteor storm, dodging and ducking its way through it.

Talking of the meteor storm well this is one of the worst bits of action I have ever seen as an astronaut flies the space shuttle through the meteors with a single joystick, not only that she dodges the meteors and rotates the shuttle 360 degrees as if it was a fighter plane. It's laughable but then so much of "Earthstorm" is from are introduction to Redding as he risks his life in a building he is blowing up to the tension between Lana Gale and Victor Stevens. And in some ways that is the movies saving grace because it becomes so corny with some really cheesy, macho BS dialogue that you end up laughing and enjoying it for everything which is bad about it. And there is a lot which is bad which will make you laugh right up until the credits roll.

As for the acting well no one is done any favours by the terrible dialogue they have to deliver and so in many ways whilst "Earthstorm" does star Stephen Baldwin, Dirk Benedict, Amy Price-Francis and John Ralston no one puts in a good performance.

What this all boils down to is that "Earthstorm" is a bad movie especially when you take it seriously as a disaster movie which is basically "Armageddon" with a few changes. But when you stop trying to take it seriously and allow yourself to laugh at how bad it is you will be entertained.

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